This is what I call MicroBlogging

I have a bad habit of getting excessively pensive at the darkest, most trying moments of my life.  It often leads to what I have termed "Xanga-Style" blogging.  Nothing against Xanga in general, but my personal Xanga is a surplus of [preteen and teenaged] angst that the world doesn't really need to see.

I think it's important to express myself on these emotional topics, but I'm worried that an overabundance of my own sadness will bring you all down with me into a pit.

In order to avoid that, I've spent the past few months curating my emotional trials into this list of microblogs.  May it be for you much like a sad love song--in your moments of pain, a commiserate friend; in your moments of triumph, a memento mori that keeps you humble.

Topics too depressing to get their own post

1. When you consistently use more conditioner or shampoo than you use shampoo or conditioner, so that you never finish both bottles at the same time.
2. Spending the whole game of Settlers of Catan winning, only to have the other players revolt against you, and cause you to lose so bad you want to cry.
3. When you're talking with a friend about a TV show or book series that you only casually enjoy, and they ask you, "Do you mind if I give away some parts?" and you say no because you're enjoying the conversation and want it to continue, but then you go back to watching or reading and you realize that the entire experience of the series is changed now that you know that one spoiler.
4. The fact that last seasons of really good, long-running TV shows always come across more as cast and crew nostalgia than as a good ending to the show.
5. Keeping so many emails in your inbox so that you remember to respond to them that you eventually cannot see all of them and so forget to respond to them.
6. Sticky notes that only stick long enough for you to stop looking at them, and then fall off the wall and you can never find them again and they remind you of nothing.
7. How much more fun it is to put up Christmas decorations than to take them down.
8. Dirty laundry.
9. Enjoying the creative stimulation that a caffeine rush gives you, but suffering from so much presticogitation that you can't actually use it to stimulate your creativity.
10. When you like the Glee version better than the original, but can tell no one.
11. Causing a traffic jam by trying to avoid a car accident.
12. Having a terrible day at work, but then having your boss tell you that you're a "great asset to the team" and then wondering whether that is a compliment or a cry for help.
13. Coming to the end of a bagel after mistakenly thinking that you had a whole half left.
14. Loving a song so much that you cannot physically restrain yourself from listening to it over and over and then slowly beginning to hate it.
15. Having really stupid pet peeves, but not knowing how to develop the patience to keep them from peeving you anymore.
16. Taxes
17. Struggling to read analog clocks when you're 24 years old.
18. Wanting to go back to college because it was the last time you knew what you were doing.
19. Wanting to share a funny Michigan-Winter joke on Facebook and then remembering that, because you don't live in Michigan anymore, your friends will be more confused than commiserate.
20. Fun and awesome dreams that are also so easy to psychoanalyze that you're too embarrassed to share them with anyone because they'll immediately know all your deepest insecurities.
21. Seeing deer in your backyard and wondering for the rest of the day if they got hit by a car because what the heck were deer doing in your "yard" in the city?
22. Things that should go viral but never will because famous internet people never see them.
23. Catching up with a book or TV series without realizing that it wasn't over yet, and then suddenly having to wait for the next installment to come out.
24. Dirty dishes.
25. Music that is at just the wrong volume so that you either have to set it to 23 and be barely able to hear it, or set it to 29 and wince at every downbeat.

Thank you for your patience in reading my woes.  I hope I did not bring you down too much.  I may be forced to continue this list in the future because, you know, we live in a fallen world and all that.

--Mary Margaret

Life's Little Lessons

Some things I've learned the hard way in the past week, for your sadistic enjoyment, in no particular order.

1. Chocolate & Mint tea that comes in a pretty tin and sounds like a wonderful way to wind down a day is actually quite caffeinated and shouldn't be consumed after 4:00 pm, and certainly not at 9:00 pm.
2. When I am caffeinated, I am consumed by manic Excel cravings.
3. I know just enough Excel functions to do serious damage to my sleep schedule.
4. Ultrasonic mice repellents may only work when they are actually on, or they may not work at all.
5. Dogs are not good mousers.
6. Low-carb diets are low-fun diets.
7. Bagels are not low-carb.

Obligatory Post about Resolutions

I'm going to be writing a post later (that, when it's finished, I shall link to here) about resolutions more generally, because I do have a bit to say on the topic.  (Friends and regular readers are now saying, "She has a bit to say about tying her shoes and flossing, too, I bet.")  For now, I just want to show you my new attempt at actually making 2014 a different year from 2013.  Because we all know that if they end up being twins, I'm going to throw something large through a plate-glass window.

For Christmas, my wonderful and talented friend Christie gave me a beautiful hand-made journal.  A few days prior to Christmas, I outfitted it as my 2014 Planner.  Like...literally, a planner.  I put plans in it.

And in the back cover, I've started a list of resolutions I have.  Some of them are things that I have to continually check in on over the course of the year (#s 1 and 5), some of them are monthly goals (#s 3 and 4), and some of them are things I will be able to check off as I go (# 2), and there is space for more to add as I go through the year and new things come up.

There are a lot of pages in the journal, and I plan to fill them up with dreams of what I will do as well as descriptions of things I have done so that, when I look back on 2014, I can remember it as a proactive and exciting time, even if things start getting rough and going south.

This post is a) a reminder to myself that I did this so that I don't forget to keep using it and b) a request for you to give me ideas of resolutions.  As you can see, I need at least 9 more.  Anything you think I should add?

Obligatory Post about 2013

This could be a 2013 In Review! post, but no one wants that.  2013 was awful, and I'm glad to see it gone.  I'll just do a quick list to remind myself of all the big things that I actually want to remember.

1. I taught myself how to knit.
2. I won a singing toothbrush for having the best sentence in a Periodic Sentence competition.
3. Caledonia High School had something like 5 snow days in February alone, giving me ample time to watch the first 2.5 seasons of Downton Abbey.  (I stopped at a time when everyone was reasonably happy and I could blissfully ignore the fact that it was all going to hit the fan in the next episode.)
4. I read Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Frankenstein, and Lord of the Flies within the span of two months, learning that a) I can actually read well and fast when I try and b) I do actually like Lord of the Flies, contrary to my 7th-grade self's opinion.  (I mean...no one actually likes Lord of the Flies...but you know what I mean.)
5. I watched Ted Dansen in Gulliver's Travels the equivalent of four times.
6. I made Professor Vande Kopple's face bleed from a too-cold snow ball to the nose.
7. Grand Rapids was voted Beer City USA
8. Amy, Luke, Jake, and I went bowling and the people who took our order of food and drinks messed up and brought us double of everything.
9. I bought two tactical scarves and a set of Game of Thrones pint glasses.
10. My cousins got married to my awesome new cousins.
11. My brother got drunk at one of the weddings and went fishing in the hotel pond.
12. I saw Mr. Sampson for the first time in years.
13. I made a big, spur-of-the-moment decision that I almost completely don't regret.
14. I went to California for the first time.
15. I left California.
16. I bought Mario Kart Wii.  Easily the best purchase of my life.
17. I went to a Muse concert with some of my favorite people.
18. I reread Ender's Game.
19. I took Fudge to dog parks.
20. I am no longer 23 so people can like me again...please?
21. I bought a new Christmas tree and way too many ornaments second hand and spent a total of about 100 hours doing nothing but sitting in front of my Christmas Grove, staring at its beauty.
22. My best friend gave me a very pretty ring and a handy excuse to stare at it from time to time.
23. I survived and thrived through another Colorado Christmas.
24. I made it through this year and it didn't kill me.

Wuhchoo Know 'Bout Me? WuhchooWuhchoo Know 'Bout Me?

Some things about me people may not know, depending on their level of involvement in my life.

1. I got my ears pierced for the first time 6 months ago

2. While changing my earrings today, I freaked out because I touched my earlobe and remembered that there was a good reason I went 23 years without even thinking about getting my ears pierced

3. I have three separate tattoos, one of which was excruciatingly painful and took over an hour to do.

4. The irony is not lost on me that I am terrified of semi-permanent, unnatural holes in my ear and yet not at all phased by totally-permanent, unnatural ink in my dermis layer.

5. Part of me has wanted for the past six months to take the earrings out and let the holes close up.

6. That part of me is not as large as the part that defiantly will not let my $30 piercing experience go to waste.

This has been a PSA.
Thank you for your time.
Mary Margaret

A walk in the park

Things I learned during my trip downtown today:

1. Other people also have time off in the middle of the day on a Tuesday. A lot of people.
2. It is possible to go 40+ years without learning the lesson "Feeding Geese goes well for No One."
3. Walking a cute dog through a park filled with children on field trips is the quickest way to unparalleled popularity.
4. My dog is the cutest.